Tag Archives: fiyastarter

FiyaStarter’s NBA Preview

28 Oct

Last night, the NBA tipped off its 2009-2010 season. So to get prepared for the upcoming year, check out FiyaStarter’s preseason rankings.

A few highlights:

5. San Antonio Spurs
Jefferson finally ends up where he was always destined to be: on a team full of the corniest, blandest niggas the world has to offer.

17. Chicago Bulls
Tyrus is so dumb he thought a pick and roll was choosing a chick at the club to leave with him.

25. Golden State Warriors
I’d really like to see S-Jax and Maggs get into a fight. The best part of it would be knowing the fight had absolutely nothing to do with basketball. It would be about some shit that means something to them…like a chick or who got the best car.

Check out the full list over at FiyaStarter.

– Aaron

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Fiyastarter’s Week 4 NFL Power Rankings

8 Oct

Funniest one yet in my opinion. Let’s take a look at the highlights:

5. Jets – Last Sunday’s game against the Saints was the equivalent of Sanchez’s performance in Medellín. Let’s hope Mark has more of a Queens Boulevard performance, next week.

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19. Cardinals – After a lackluster first quarter to the season, Kurt Warner set up a conference call with Satan during his bye week to “get on the same page.” With his soul already sold, I dunno what else he had to bargain wi—oh, God no. I just remembered, Kurt has like seven kids.

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25. Raiders – Here’s a fun exercise, once the NBA season starts: substitute JaMarcus’ completions/attempts for the shooting lines of a nigga like Ben Gordon or Mike Bibby and I bet you won’t be able to tell the difference.

Check out all 32 teams over at FiyaStarter.

– Aaron

Fiya Starter’s 2009 NFL Preview and Fantasy Advice

10 Sep

The NFL kicks off tonight, and the hilarious cats over at FiyaStarter have just dropped their 2009 NFL Power Rankings and if you’ve ever seen the site or their work in Complex Magazine, you know you’re getting more than just Xs and Os.

On the Green Bay Packers:

It’s sad that despite his continued maturation and clear superiority to Alex Smith, nothing Aaron Rodgers does will matter if he doesn’t beat the Wrangler spokes model up in Minnesota, but then again he’s a millionaire, so whatever, his problem.

Their 12 Fantasy Football Rules for Black People is also comedic gold:

Step: 10: Don’t take a black QB. Um, sorry. I ain’t even gonna explain it. Just remember I said don’t do it.

*Looks at McNabb on fantasy football team…*

Are you ready for some football!?

– Aaron